( Day Two, with pictures and descriptions )
The long-awaited
( Day One )
- Mood:
moody
- Mood:
anxious
It was a hot summer day in my small apartment with no air-conditioning. My electric fan was working it's heart out as I spent seemingly unending hour after hour cleaning and packing. My phone rang with a message- one of my JTE's was offering to help. He'd made the offer before, but I was hesitant about accepting. I was capable of handling this on my own. But I looked at the mountain of stuff still in the middle of the room and decided that some assistance might not be a bad thing.
Even though I had gotten rid of numerous possessions, there was a lot left that I had to deal with. In the days prior, junkmen came to my place to take away by big things. For all I know, they threw it all away, even the new furniture that I had bought not even one year ago. The previous night, the new principal from Yachi high school (and who happened to be my next-door neighbor) stopped by and I gave her lots of things that I couldn't take with me or didn't need anymore. She had just moved in a few months ago and did not have a lot in her apartment, so as my farewell and her welcome gift, she received lots of dishes, cleaning supplies, candles, pots and pans... anything that I could bear to part with that wasn't owned by the school.
Together, Tanaka-sensei and I finished my packing. Even though I had every spare box the school could scrounge, it wasn't enough. I need more, and the nearest place to find them was the supermarket. Normally, I had no reservations about a quick pop over to the store. But I knew that my friend who sold yakitori (grilled chicken on a stick) would be there. We'd often talk when I stopped by for a quick bite, but I had already said my goodbyes and managed to walk away without crying (at least that he saw). I wanted my goodbye to be the end and to be clear cut, but I needed the boxes. So I went to the store and saw a person that I thought I might never see again much sooner than I ever thought.
We packed and packed in the late July heat until my helper had to leave. I thanked him for his help and for taking things that I didn't have space for. (I just hope he didn't throw it away when he got home...) Then continued alone until my supervisor came. We finished the last bit of packing and cleaning and boxing. Then she and her husband helped me load up their vehicles and headed to Yamagata. My apartment was empty, save for the appliances that belonged to Sagae High School: my television, a blender I never used, refrigerator, microwave, kerosene heater, and my trusty electric fan that was the only way I survived the sweltering heat, and just barely at that. It was a weird feeling, my apartment that was so full of my life was now hollow and empty. I shut the lights off and locked the door one final time. As I drove off, that was the last time I saw my Japanese home.
I was effectively homeless, which made writing shipping labels a bit tricky. What should I list as the return address? My address was no longer mine; I had no place to return to in that country.
The postal workers were very nice, especially considering that it was late- much later than other post offices would normally be open. They helped consolidate boxes into bigger ones, reducing the cost and making less work for them and others. The result was a bit jerry-rigged but it worked, even making it back to Wisconsin safe and sound (but not quite everything worked out that nicely). I still had more than ten boxes, which qualified me for a discount, but I had to fight for it because they didn't even know about it!
Part of what had to be done was outside, hauling the boxes from vehicle to building, and in the twilight the mosquitoes found me. It had been so long since I had been bit, but there I was, already spotted with those red, itchy bumps just as I was about to travel to a land where a bite like that could have serious repercussions. But who cares about malaria when you have packages in the mail?
I spent that night with my supervisor and her family. I still had a few days on my contract, but for me it was the end. I was leaving and it felt like a vacation now, not like I was leaving my home of two glorious years filled with homesickness, culture shock, and inability to understand all that happened around me. It was great, it was not so great, but I was leaving. And it stopped feeling like it. My upcoming trip put me in a different state of mind. I wasn't leaving Japan anymore- I was going to a new place. The next morning I started my next journey.
P.S. Happy Halloween!
- Mood:
melancholy
It's been almost a month since my last post. My internet habits have changed a bit since I came home...
My last few days as an Assistant Language Teacher went by quickly. I spent time cleaning my desk and getting things ready for my successor. My final day that I planned to spend at the main school ended with my goodbye party. Normally, I would have left at my usual time, which was earlier than the other teachers were allowed to leave. All of the teachers would gather in the entranceway and see me off. I wasn’t sure if I wanted that to happen because I knew I would cry if it did. However, with the party at the end of the day, I stayed late and avoided a big farewell.
The party was at a traditional Japanese restaurant. (Normally they try to have it a Western-style restaurant for the benefit of the ALT, the non-Japanese of the group. I never cared where- food is food.) There was some reminiscing of my time there and I learned of what they were thinking before I arrived- the only thing they knew of
They gave me some farewell gifts, small things to remember my time there, one of which was a staff polo shirt. Because I was not always there, I didn’t get a chance to sign-up for one. I saw them at the sports festival and really liked them- everything from the color to what it said. (The color was blue and it had the school emblem on the arm and the back read, “Sagae High, fire up!”) The English teachers weren’t the only ones to give me farewell gifts. The teachers at Yachi gave me something, along with two teachers from the main school who I chatted with. And earlier in the month, another teacher gave me a ping-pong paddle and case for the sports fest (table tennis was my sport, after all.) A former secretary from school even stopped by my apartment one morning to drop off a gift! I was really touched by their thoughtfulness.
After the party and surprising my supervisor by crying on the way home, I spent the night like several nights prior- cleaning until the wee hours. I had two years worth of stuff to either send home or get rid of. At that time, I had a bit of tunnel vision and couldn’t think outside of my city for what to do with my belongings. There were a lot of things that I couldn’t keep- blankets, tables, couch, etc. But what I could keep, I organized and put into boxes. It was quite the task and often the sun starting to come into my room was the sign that I should stop cleaning for the night. It is a good thing that I kept that free eye mask from the night bus.
- Mood:
contemplative
My last weekend as an ALT, I played taiko for one final time. It was for a 60th birthday party for an entire junior high class. (High school is stressful and admission is based on skill and passing the entrance exam, but junior highs are assigned by location, so the bonds made there are more important and long-lasting. The 60th birthday is a big event because the different signs of the zodiac-years and elements- have made a complete rotation, so it is like being born again.) Some alums from the group joined in for a song, so my last time drumming was a bit shorter than normal. However, it was exhilarating to stand there and just feel the sound- taiko drums are not wimpy; they are deep, throbbing calls to the gods, the dragons, and the mountains.
When we were done, all I wanted to do was to help my group move the drums out of the way. However, Mr. Ishiyama had different plans. He was one of the party attendees, as well as an organizer of the taiko group and monthly Chatters meetings, not to mention a friend. He asked me to talk with his old English teacher. Speaking my native language is not difficult for me and it was important to Mr. Ishiyama. We conversed for a while- it seems that all old Japanese guys say the same things. Just smile and be polite. When I saw an opportunity to leave, though, I took it. The others had already finished moving the drums, so I felt bad about not being useful and explained my absence. The mother of the group asked if I know, "companion." That word was in English. I said that I understand the word but... Sometimes cognates are used a little differently than in the original language. She tried explaining, but then I couldn't understand the Japanese that she used. Then she remembered another borrowed word- hostess. That one I knew all too well. While it is a bit disturbing to think that I was close to being hired out by my taiko group, at least I know that if I want to come back to Japan, I have some different job options.
- Mood:
not flirty
- Mood:
tired
The day after the Sagae high schools' closing ceremonies, I had my last one. The students at Yachi are friendly and less stressed than at the main branch of Sagae high school. That was also the only school of mine that had students enter the speech contest, so it means that was the school where I had the most one on one time with students, if only a few. Sagae had an English club, but it is not the same.
That day at school was not just the closing ceremony, but also the last day of the class match sports festival. All day the students are running around in the hot, sticky weather. Then, after a tiring day of competing against each other, they gather in the gym. Of course, it is not air-conditioned. The conditions were so bad that I saw one girl collapse and at least three more had to be escorted/carried out in the course of the ceremony. During my entire time up on the stage, they made the students stand. I don't know why. It didn't make any sense. I can appreciate if they wanted to show me respect by standing, but it was not a good time for that. Afterwards, I said good-bye to some students and one girl who won the speech contest my first year gave me a bracelet. It is a bright pink livestrong band. She is a very sweet girl and I am going to miss her. When I arrived, she was just a first year student. She is going to graduate at the end of this school year. Good luck Riko!
For the longest time, I have wanted to try kyuudo, traditional Japanese archery. I talked with the coaches at both schools, but it never came to anything. It was my last day at that school; it was my last chance. The kyuudo coach is really friendly at that school, so I new it was a good opportunity. However, because he is so busy, he wasn't there when I stopped by. The students on the team didn't speak a lot of English and the appointed spokesperson kept saying how she hates English. But liking the language and liking the teacher are two different things. After watching them for a while, then I got to try. I didn't stand on the platform where they normally shoot from. Instead, I stood about halfway between that and the targets. My first couple rounds I couldn't hit the target, but all of the arrows landed in the same area, so that was good. Later, I had an arrow bounce off of the target, and then finally, I hit the target and it was almost dead center! What a good way to end my time as a teacher!
As I left school that day, all of the teachers gathered in the entranceway to see me off. It was really sweet. And it might have made me cry. I can't remember- I cried a lot that week. My last day at Yachi ended with their smiling facing and waving hands. It was a good parting, even if it made me sad.
- Mood: exhausted
Today was the closing ceremony for Sagae high school. Or rather, ceremonies. Each branch had their own, but on the same day. First was the main branch. I was fine as I walked up and sat on my lonely chair on the stage. I was fine as the student council president gave me flowers and told me thank you for teaching them. I was fine as I gave my farewell speech. I ended it with the line, "Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened." After some mutual bowing, I left the stage, walking past all of the students, but right in line with the sannensei, the students I have taught the most and been with the longest. I caught many of their eyes, and the more eyes I looked into, the closer I got to tears. I've been told that I am popular with the male students (I wonder why...), but they rarely talked with me. However, as I was walking past, it was many of their eyes that caught me. I was able to hold it in and maintain my composure across the length of the gym, but as I sat down in the small office adjoining the gym, they finally came. I'm such a liar. I was crying because it is over. I am sure that it won't be the last time I'll be crying here, either. I've come close many times lately, but this was the first that the tears finally came.
And then I had to do it all over again.
The agricultural branch is a lot smaller than the main one. It is a more intimate setting. No flowers that time, though, ironically. More on this story once I have got some sleep.
-------
The agricultural branch reminds me the most of home. The students there are casual with their uniform, to say the least. The wear brightly colored t-shirts under their mandatory white, button down. They have big belt buckles and dyed hair. One guy wears an earring. The teachers don't like it because it all goes against the dress code, but I don't care. I like the rebels. (So long as they behave in class.)
I gave my speech in front of the small student body- only one class in each year, and not usually full ones at that. I had a better hold on my emotions the second time around, feeling a bit drained from before. But still, as I stood on the side looking at the students whom I may never see again, I felt the tears well up again. I just closed my eyes and focused on centering myself. I must have had my eyes closed for some time, because one of the students, the one with the earring, asked me (via his cellphone translation) if I was sleepy. I told him, no, I was sad. Then they did goofy things to make me smile. They may be rebellious, but they have a good heart. That is what I love about that school.
- Mood: sad
- Mood:
hot
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